My Goldfish is Bored!
The hilarious illustrated bedtime story your kids will beg to hear again and again — and that you'll secretly love reading aloud.
A Bedtime Story That Actually Makes Bedtime Fun
Gerald the goldfish is done. Completely, utterly, dramatically done. His dry wit lands on two levels — kids laugh at the silliness, parents laugh at the relatability.
Each page ramps up the chaos. From counting castle windows to a surprise puppy arrival — every page turn brings a bigger laugh and a "read it again!" moment.
Short punchy sentences, built-in rhythm, and Gerald's perfectly timed sighs make this a joy to perform. Parents report it's the one book they actually enjoy reading.
The story wraps with a warm, funny twist that sends kids to sleep smiling. No tears, no "just one more chapter" — just giggles and happy dreams.
Turn "I Don't Want to Sleep!" Into "Read It Again!"
Bedtime battles are real. But a book that makes kids laugh so hard they forget to resist? That's a superpower. My Goldfish is Bored! is the secret weapon parents are sharing across school gates everywhere.
- Instantly engages even reluctant readers
- Short enough for any attention span — long enough to satisfy
- Works for solo reading or parent-led read-aloud sessions
- Funny for kids AND the adults reading it — a genuine double act
- Instant digital download — start reading in under 60 seconds
Kids Beg for It. Parents Love It. Gerald Remains Unimpressed.
"My 7-year-old made me read it FOUR times in one night. Gerald's face on every page had us both in tears laughing. Absolute gold — pun intended."
"I bought this on a whim and it's now the most requested book in our house. My son quotes Gerald at dinner. 'I am still bored.' I can't stop laughing."
"Finally a book that MY kid chose to read — not me forcing it. She read it herself twice and then demanded we act it out. Gerald is her hero now."
"I'm a primary school teacher and I've used this as a read-aloud in class. The kids were absolutely riveted. Perfect pacing, perfect humour. More please!"
"Bought this as a gift and the parents messaged me to say thank you three times. It's the funniest children's book I've read since the Pigeon books. Instant classic."
One Week. One Fishbowl. One Very Dramatic Goldfish.
Gerald has swum left. Gerald has swum right. Gerald has counted the windows on his castle (three — always three). Gerald is, quite frankly, done with all of it. Follow his hilariously deadpan week, day by day, as the chaos outside his bowl escalates — right up to the surprise Sunday delivery that changes everything.
- Monday: Left. Right. Repeat. Gerald is already over it.
- Wednesday: The dog gets a walk. The cat gets a cuddle. Gerald gets fish flakes.
- Friday: A face appears at the bowl. "BLOOP BLOOP BLOOP." Gerald is not amused.
- Sunday: A box arrives. With air holes. This is new.
Make Tonight's Bedtime the Best One Yet
Instant digital download. Start reading in under 60 seconds. No experience required — just show up and let Gerald do the rest.